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6* Varieties...


Hostile Team
PMFP: an expose
6* Varieties...
Side Effects
Type to me, baby
Potted Meat Kills!!!
Dave Barry
Where to Find It
Potted Meat Food Product

(in order of discovery)

Libby's Potted Meat Food Product

Now, what can I say about Libby's Potted Meat Food Product? I can say that this is the tinned mass of putrifying cat vomit that started it all, that cold fateful night/morning. I don't have a can before me, but I recall the ingredients as mechanically seperated chicken, partially defatted cooked pork fatty tissue, beef tripe, partially defatted cooked beef fatty tissue, natural flavorings, salt, sodium nitrite, and sodium erythorbate. I may have forgotten a few minor things but you can look it up for yourself. I personally reccomend driving to them, if you're located near Parsippany, NJ. Of course, they will give you no information, but if you talk to the administrative assistant, a.k.a. The Potted Meat Nazi, then you will recieve a verbal spanking, including suggestions to look it up on the "veb" and something about in the "virld of the grown-ups."

Armour Potted Meat Food Product

I wrote this whole beautiful thing for Armour, but I got booted off and I'm pissed so this is all Armour gets now , because I don't feel like retyping it.

Questions or Comments? Call 1-800-528-0849

Mechanically Separated Chicken, Beef Tripe, Partially Defatted Cooked Beef Fatty Tissue, Beef Hearts, Water, Partially Defatted Cooked Fatty Pork Tissue, Salt. Less than 2%: Mustard, Natural Flavorings, Dried Garlic, Vinegar, Dextrose, Sodium Erythorbate, Sodium Nitrite.
Serv. Size 1/4 cup (62g); Servings 2.5; Calories 80; Fat Calories 50; Total Fat 5g (8%); Saturated Fat 2.5g (12%); Cholest. 55mg (18%); Sodium 550mg (23%); Total Carb 0g (0%); Protein 8g; Vitamin A 0%; Vitamin C 0%; Calcium 4%; Iron 6%

Goya Potted Meat Food Product

This was a shock to discover this, as we had previously thought that Goya made only rice and beans and foods of that sort, such as pineapple soda. So the original discovery of Goya Potted Meat Food Product caused us to wonder if those things we had been eating were really rice, beans, and pineapple soda, as we had previously learned that potted meat is the leftovers from whatever else the company makes. Rest assured however, that we have since learned that Goya makes things, such as canned Vienna Sausage and chicken-esque products. The picture on the front of this can seems to show glistening cat vomit spread on a Ritz cracker and garnished with an olive and parsley. It also comes with the serving suggestions of "perfect for snacks, sandwiches, crackers, and more." Yum Yum.

Another interesting facet of Goya Potted Meat Food Product, is that there are three different can varieties of it at the Shoprite, in Dover, NJ. One 5.5oz can and two different 3oz. cans. I think the ingredients are the same in all however.

Beef Tripe, Beef Hearts, Mechanically Separated Chicken, Partially Defatted Cooked Pork Fatty Tissue, Water, Salt. 2 percent or less: Natural Flavorings, Dried Garlic, Vinegar, Dextrose, Sodium Erythorbate, Sodium Nitrite.
Call 1-800-ASK GOYA

Bryan Potted Meat Food Product

Really, what can be said about a brand that advertises itself as "Flavor of the South?" That pretty much sums it up for all of potted meat. This brand was involved in a drive-by meating of Dan's house, an event which served mostly as a reminder of why Dante should not drive mini-vans. He only got to drive because sprinting across a lawn, leaping onto the porch, placing the potted meat, ringing the doorbell, leaping down, and sprinting away require more speed and agility than he has. His lack of agility is also evident in driving a mini-van.

Bryan also has a website (see links) which is entertaining sheerly by the homepage which states "There's a lot to like about living in the South. We hope that our website helps your family experience and enjoy the southern lifestyle."

Mechanically Separated Chicken, Partially Defatted Cook Beef Fatty Tissue, Beef Tripe, Water, No More Than 2% Flavorings, Vinegar, Salt, Dextrose, Extractives of Paprika, Sodium Nitrite.
QUESTIONS? COMMENTS? NUTRITION? Call 1-800-544-3870 Mon.-Fri. 8am-5pm CST

Pathmark Potted Meat Food Product

Generic Potted Meat? What could be better? Afterall, this stuff is apparently "perfect for snacks and sandwiches". This is one of the three brands we found in the Jefferson Pathmark. We're not exactly sure if the three brands of potted meat explain Jefferson, NJ or if Jefferson, NJ explains the three brands of potted meat. On another note, NJ is home to three brands of potted meat. The Pathmark hails from Woodbridge, with the Goya and Libby's coming from Seacaucus and Parsippany, respectively.

Also, while all potted meats are USDA inspected, Pathmark is the potted potted meat which is inspected for wholesomeness.

Mechanically Separated Chicken, Partially Defatted Cooked Pork Fatty Tissue, Beef Tripe, Partially Defatted Fatty Beef Tissue, Vinegar, Salt, Spices, Sugar, Natural Flavors, Sodium Erythorbate, Sodium Nitrite.
Serv. Size 1 can (85g); Calories 170; Fat Calories 110; Total Fat 12g (19%); Sat. Fat 3g (16%); Cholest. 50mg (16%); Sodium 550mg (23%); Total Carb 0g(0%); Total Fiber 0g (0%); Sugars 0g; Protein 15g; Vitamin A 0%; Vitamin C 0%; Calcium 2%; Iron 4%

Hormel Potted Meat Food Product

Hormel, the makers of Spam, brings to you Spam by-products in the name of Potted Meat Food Product. The front of the can presents a trio of Ritz crackers with a cat vomit spread (though not particularly glistening) garnished with parsley and you guessed olives! There's some small print next to that which surprisingly enough does not warn of temporary blindness and death, but rather of a "Serving Suggestion". Personally, I'm scared of Spam, let's not even think of Spam by-products.

Beef Tripe, Mechanically Separated Chicken, Beef Hearts, Partially Defatted Beef Fatty Tissue, Meat Broth, Vinegar, Salt, Flavoring, Sugar, Sodium Nitrite.
Serv. Size 4 Tbsp (56g); Servings per container about 2; Calories 100; Fat Calories 70, Total Fat 8g (12%); Sat. Fat. 3.5g (18%); Cholest. 50mg (17%); Sodium 610mg (25%); Total Carb. 0g (0%); Fiber 0g (0%); Sugars 0g; Protein 7g; Vitamin A 0%; Vitamin C 0%; Calcium 2%; Iron 4%.

*If you know of any more brands, I want to know, so email me.